poor thing

Aug. 5th, 2003 07:13 pm
absolutedestiny: (girl)
[personal profile] absolutedestiny
Today I started teaching a korean girl called Liz (not sure what her real korean name is yet).... but really I don't want to teach her because I don't want her to be in England at all.

It seems that a lot of Korean (and other east asian) students from well-off families are often sent to schools in England so they can become well versed in the language and go to an English university. I've taught a couple of kids who are from the same situation. Liz is only here for a month, at which point she returns to an international school in Brighton.

She's staying with a host family, by which I mean a dear old lady who feeds her and offers her a room. As it's out of term time there isnt anyone around at college and the classes are one on one tuition. It sounds like hell to me - I'd have gone nuts if my parents had sent me to some foreign country where I had no chance of making any friends just so I could learn a little more than other kids my age.

What's more.... she's 14.

14 years old and is being denied a summer holiday with her friends back home. I'm sorry, but education or no it's prison for someone that age - she has nothing in her life but classes. She's also 14 inthe way that *I* remember 14 (korea being more conservative and traidional, kids are often still kids at that age) - she actually used the phrase "no-one to play with". I haven't heard a teenager say that in a very long time.

So, I've decided to teach an alternative curriculum... something that she might actually enjoy enough to occupy her evenings a little and not just make her cry herself to sleep every night. She's a darling thing too - incredibly well mannered and pretty. A delight to teach, but I just want her to be at home with her friends.

:-/

Date: 2003-08-05 11:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kusoyaro.livejournal.com
Has she expressed specifically that she's unhappy being there?

Date: 2003-08-05 11:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] absolutedestiny.livejournal.com
As today was the first time we met I used it as a "getting to know you session" where she told me how unhappy she was :(

Date: 2003-08-05 11:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kusoyaro.livejournal.com
That's so sad :(

She really cries herself to sleep at night? Has she been in England by herself all summer?

Date: 2003-08-05 11:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quu.livejournal.com
I think a picnic is in order... is there a nice park nearby?

one thing I know the british can do VERY well is pack a lunch (wonderful british girlfreind while I liked in Frankfurt)

Date: 2003-08-05 11:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] absolutedestiny.livejournal.com
I think so - she says she only ever really goes home for Christmas.

She has friends at her school and lives in a dorm but that's just term time.

Date: 2003-08-05 11:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quu.livejournal.com
got its been a while since I thought of Kathy... she had the most wonderully pouty lips...

short unruly hair... very much the model of a young british woman...

could not cook to save her live... but she could pack lunchs and fix the most amazing meals... as long as you kept her away from anything that generated heat (Stove, oven, grill)

Date: 2003-08-05 11:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] absolutedestiny.livejournal.com
University Parks is right next to where I teach :)

Date: 2003-08-05 11:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kusoyaro.livejournal.com
Just be careful she doesn't develop a crush on sensei ^_^

Date: 2003-08-05 11:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quu.livejournal.com
nah... but to be sure its better that he bring multiple people with him to the picnic....

besides... given a week or so she is going away... so no worries of that to happen

Date: 2003-08-05 11:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quu.livejournal.com
pretty...

I used to live near Gruenburg park in Frankfurt...

I think of all the places I lived... I liked Frankfurt the best... I was in an awesome location... and the city had everythign I needed (except internet access sucked at the time)

Date: 2003-08-05 11:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kusoyaro.livejournal.com
I dunno, if I were 14, I think I'd be pretty intimidated by an outing with a bunch of people people 10 years older than me.

Date: 2003-08-05 11:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] absolutedestiny.livejournal.com
I've never been to frankfurt but wanted to go - the day I was supposed to visit the father of the family I was staying with was ill. It was his home town but had moved to Bonn for work.

Ah, Bonn in the early 90s. As many construction cranes as people :)

Date: 2003-08-05 11:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] absolutedestiny.livejournal.com
I'm hoping to match her up with another korean student of mine called Gawain, who's 15 :)

Date: 2003-08-05 11:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quu.livejournal.com
gah... your right...
bonn is the sour capitol of the world

Date: 2003-08-05 11:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quu.livejournal.com
Ian... the match maker of little lost asian flowers

Date: 2003-08-05 11:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kusoyaro.livejournal.com
Only part of Germany I've ever been to was Black Forest. All I remember is the cuckoo clock shop...there's still one hanging on the wall of my parents' house, though the weights (used to "power" the clock) have long since been taken off and stuffed in the closet...the cuckoos were amusing for maybe a day :P

Date: 2003-08-05 12:27 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
we had a chinese guy at college who was in the same situation, only he was my age... and he ended up giving england the finger and went back home!

so not the same at all, really, but nevermind ^^

-laura

Date: 2003-08-05 12:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ashyukun.livejournal.com
I think I've been there at least once. IIRC, it wasn't too far from Abram's Complex where my school was. Frankfurt was a lot of fun. We loved going downtown and just wandering around. And getting hot Nutella crepes from the street vendors. Yum.

I think I liked Frankfurt better than Nurenburg... but I was a lot younger when we lived there. Frankfurt overall felt a lot more relaxed to me than most if not all of Bavaria. Though my German got a lot less amused looks in Bavaria, since it was where I initially learned it, and I just can't ditch the hard 'ch' I learned initially and use the softer, Hoch Deutche 'sh'-ish pronunciation.

Date: 2003-08-05 02:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ersatzinsomnia.livejournal.com
Wow, that brings back memories. About two years ago we had a girl come do an undergrad research internship with us. I was to be her mentor, and to be honest, she wasn't my first choice. While looking over all the CVs of possible students, hers stood out for being THIRTY TWO pages long. Went all the way back to elementary school and listed stuff like spelling bee championships, but also some pretty significant awards. She'd taken ten (10!) AP classes and come through with a 4.0. Skipped two grades. Freakishly weird, but my boss pressured me into choosing her.

When I finally met her, I found out where all this motivation came from. She was an Indian girl who'd been pressured into all this advanced stuff by her parents. Her dad is a professor here at GaTech, and she was home from her first semester at college for break.

I found out all this stuff because she'd been going to Cal Tech for her first semester. After finally getting away from the parents for the first time in her life, she'd relaxed a bit and really bombed out her first semester. Thing is, apparently that's such a common occurence at Cal Tech that your first semester doesn't actually count against your GPA. Further, profs. aren't allowed to give parents their children's grades without the students being there. She knew she'd messed up, and planned to make it up the next semester, especially since the first one didn't count, but she decided to lie and told her folks that she got straight "A"s.

Her dad knew someone in administration at Cal Tech and weaseled out the truth.

I've never seen someone so terrified of their own parents. Burst into tears in the lab.

In the end, her parents pulled her out of Cal Tech before the semester was over and transferred her to Ga Tech so her parents could "keep an eye on her." She's living at home and commuting to classes.

THAT'S sad. If my parents ever pulled anything like that on me, I don't think anyone would survive the ordeal.

Date: 2003-08-05 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dwchang.livejournal.com
D-Dubya is korean...not a lost asian flower though :P.

I do somewhat understand what she is dealing with. I have never dealt with this, but do know how things are in Korea and with having your parents send you off to learn things.

I guess I somewhat understand since it is for their education and it's not because they don't care. I guess it's just a cultural clash. I do sympathize though....